Meanderings 2

1. Have you noticed how prizes on game shows haven't at all kept up with the rate of inflation? For example, I can remember watching America's Funniest Home Videos with the mitochondria of talent that is Bob Saget. Each show consisted of the cutest dad getting hit in the balls by his toddler winning ten thousand dollars. This was just a little more than ten years ago. But now, just like everything else, game show prizes have been ultra-supersized. There was no "gradual" increment of money--we all of the sudden jumped from 10K to 1 Million dollars. Just like that. Why didnt we "work" towards the million? There were no shows offering 250 thousand, or even 500 thousand. Soon, one million dollars will seem like nothing, and game shows will have to "up the ante" again. There's an expression Timmycocks can look up on urbandictionary.com

2. Enough already with the cartoons and comedies that make allusions to the fight scenes from The Matrix films, when characters are fighting like normal, and then, all of the sudden, do backwards somersaults into the air, and levitate for a bit, while all the while punching and kicking in slow motion. Do these shows really think they're original? There's nothing funny about kung fu, and I know, since I was round-housed kicked in the face.

3. Do you think Skittles and M&Ms would get along in real life? They have to be related somehow. Would it be like a racist holy-war jihad kind of thing? Or would they live in peace, respecting the other's right to be fruity or chocolaty? If they intermarried, their kids would be like those chocolate oranges that are only sold around Christmas time, and only bought for Yankee swaps.

4. You don't see too many "Baby on Board" signs anymore. Apparently, they're all grown up.

5. What were those signs actually supposed to do? Encourage kidnappers or car-jackings? Prevent accidents? Chances are that if another driver was taking the time to read your dumb sign, he or she was taking their eyes off the road, where they should have been in the first place. And that, kids, is how accidents happen in the first place. Remember this, if nothing else.