Meanderings 66

Just a few for youse

1. Still, in 2011, when you go into a store and look at picture frames, the picture frame manufacturers need to fill the frames with fake/example photographs of a couple with exceptionally white teeth holding a cat or playing touch football. Why is this? Do they think Americans are really that stupid (they might be right) that they need 'suggestions' of what to do with the picture frames they buy? Might seeing some 'examples pictures' in the frames encourage them or put them over the fence to the point where they might say "ya know? I never thought of using a frame for this!! I think I might buy this now!!!"

2. The word "retired." So, when people were still working, is that saying that they were "tired," but, at their retirement party, they momentarily were wide awake, and then, when they woke up the next day, they were suddenly "tired" again? Wouldnt people be LESS tired when they were REtired, since retirement means you have less responsibilities and less stuff to get up for, etc? Is going out for boneless chicken breast and a baked potato at 3:48 pm that exhausting?

3. Wedding showers are simply parties to celebrate the fact that a party is going to take place. That is it. Oh, and they give guys some well deserved peace and quiet. Unless they are those 'jack and jill' monstrosities. But, mostly, they just celebrate the fact that a bigger and cooler party will happen soon thereafter. Better hope little kids don't get wise to the logic of wedding showers. Suddenly, Callum will be saying to me in February: "Daddy, can we have the party to celebrate my REAL birthday in June??"

4. A funny phrase that I heard a seemingly educated and professional person say recently was "literally unbelievable," as in "His foreign policy stance is LITERALLY unbelievable." Think about how stupid that phrase is....NOTHING can be 'literally' unbelievable because all unbelievable things are already LITERALLY like that. That is why they are unbelievable. Try this: DO NOT think of the color purple. DONT. See what I mean? I dont know. I'm confused now.

5. Reality TV shows love to show the passage of time by means of clouds passing by really really fast across the backdrop of blue skies. Cute.

6. Facebook needs to get cuter and fresher with their 'relationship status' qualifiers. Right now you've got "married to..." and "in a relationship with"....and "divorced...." I mean they have "its complicated," but that's as cute as they get. Put me in charge of that stuff! I'd kill it! We need "in an abusive relationship" or "married to deadbeat____" or "she's a freakin' cheater, that chick_____" or "cheating on______" with ______" or "friends with benns with____" or "stalking______" and such and such....