Callum's First Halloween!

Some pictures. More text and stories will follow tomorrow. It was a festive, crowded house, with Kristin, Anthony, Chelsea, Grammy, Grampy, GREAT-Grandpop, Jon, and Mel--all of whom came to see Callum in his little pumpkin consume. He looked adorable, as expected. But I think it was hot for him. And he was tired, as he stayed up 2 hours past his usual bedtime. He did some "trick or treating," stopping over at Bill's, Paul's, and Cindy's for "candy." As usual, we had well over two hundred kids--and that is just until we ran out of candy! Twon and I (accompanied by Jon, Mel, and Kris at the end) sat out at the end of the driveway and handed out candy and....um....enjoyed a wheat beverage or two. Some of the father's asked us how they could one of our "treats," and we told them they could have a beer....for seven dollars. Personally, I had a great time talking to kids, seeing costumes, laughing with parents, and giving 17 year old "Goth" kids a hard time. Basically, every time a kid over the age of 16 came looking for a handout, I told them how I loved their "Hannah Montana" costume. This really pissed some kids off. You know those emo-goths....they're pretty sensitive. But what are they doing trick or treating anyway? Oh well. All in good fun. Here is Callum playing with Auntie Kristin....Auntie KK bought Callum his first "cell phone." JEEZ!!! THANKS AUNTIE KK!!!! As usual with everything else, Callum tried putting this in his mouth.....

Here he is with his great-grandfather. Look at the little "beret." Its like he's a little artist or something......

A shot with Aunt Kristin and Uncle Anthony. Soon, they'll know how it feels, since they're having a boy too!!! Callum is going to have an "accomplice," with whom he will terrorize Papa Goldsmith, putting ice cubes down his shirt, inserting whoopie cushions under his chairs, etc.

A good "Maine family" shot. George looks floored as always. And I am wearing my "Newfoundland" hat. Lynne heard that Glen Beck was on the radio, so she is looking at that instead of the camera. haha


I thought this was a good shot of his costume. I love him SO MUCH!!

Poor Uncle Jon and Mel!!!! Callum waiting up to see them, but by the time they got there, he was DONE! I love this picture because there's so much expression. Callum looks miserable, Mel looks so sad about the whole situation, and Jonathan is trying to pretend everything is just fine. Hilarious!
And Happy Birthday Cindy! As usual, the Goldsmith/Greenlaw households were sort of "open," and we went over to hang out by the bonfire, eat snacks, and have laughs. A great night. And now the Favrys are here for the weekend to see their nephew. Great stuff.

A Songwriting Machine!!

Well, not exactly. But I have been doing a lot of writing lately. Its funny: I go through these "dry spells" where I wont write anything for months. And then, suddenly, there comes a monsoon of verse. Being asked to write a wedding song for Chris and Michelle has been a great honor, and a great impetus to write. And then there's Callum. He gives me plenty of "fodder." But he just never gives me time to write it down. I'm finding the melodies come easily....but the lyrics are very difficult to write, since its hard to find good, solid chunks of the "quiet time" I need. But the wheels are in motion for a good 4 or 5 new songs, and I can't wait to share them--which is my all time favorite thing to do in the world. So come on over, and we'll go down into the men's den in the basement and I'll swoon you. All of you. Or, if you want some recorded stuff, let me know.

Jonathan got a Nintendo Wii. Amanda was playing baseball, and she was pretty good at it. They tried to get me to play, but, with all due respect to people who enjoy the Wii, I find the whole thing kind of pointless. Maybe its because I like to go outside and play with real people. But I dont know. Maybe my bias is skewed by the fact that I'm an educator, and there are many many schools that want to buy Wiis as part of their phys. ed and special ed programs. They think they'll "inspire" kids to exercise. Once again: GO OUTSIDE. There must be some wood to stack or leaves to rake someplace.....

(why is Jared so bitter??)

What a happy little guy! Callum is getting ready to find out tomorrow if he's having a boy cousin or a girl cousin. Even though Daddy knows its a boy cousin, Kristin and Anthony's ultrasound will confirm it for sure. Either way, Callum told us, he can't wait to play trucks, take baths, and elicit work for his snow removal business (a long story which I will tell sometime).

Chins anyone?

Because if you need a few, Callum has plenty to spare. The little moose has tons of Halloween attire, and he's wearing it all each day as he gets ready for his first trick or treating experience. Well, he's not actually going trick or treating, but he is a) dressing up (as a pumpkin) and b) going to a party (the annual Goldsmith-Greenlaw "block" event). Its Cindy's birthday and they really do it up for Halloween. Which reminds me: we've got to go buy some candy for the 300+ trick or treaters we get. Now, if I was a liberal democrat, I'd be looking for some government subsidies to defray the cost of the candy I have to buy to "hand out" to the trick or treaters. I mean, why should I have to pay for it all? But, I'm a Republican. (wah wah wah).
Good luck tomorrow Favry's (and good luck with the ultrasound too!)

*note-the previous joke was made because both "grandmothers" will be accompanying the parents to be to their appointment.

Books (and Music)

Two of my favorite things. And I've been on a pretty steady stream of good books lately. Sometimes I seem to get in a funk, so to speak, and I can't find anything worthwhile to read (when I actually have the time to read my meager 10 pages per day). But, through the summer, and continuing throughout the fall, they've all been A-pluses. I didnt put the photos on here, but I LOVE YOU BETH COOPER is a hilarious novel about high school graduation night...and they adventures associated with it. Also, DIARY OF A WIMPY KID may be the funniest damn book I've ever read; there were SEVERAL parts where I just laughed out loud. Its a "novel in cartoons," and it chronicles the life of Greg, a middle-schooler, going through all the trials and tribulations that we all remember so dearly from middle school. Check it out. Right now I'm reading:

Its a fantastic book--and I'm usually not one for non-fiction. Its actually written by a high school teacher in Winthrop (about 35 minutes away), and it is full of Maine lore, history, anecdotes, and information--all about the amazing canoe. The Penobscot nation really knew their stuff; one of their chiefs paddled from Moosehead Lake ALL THE WAY to Boston! In one weekend!! He used lakes, connecting rivers, coastlines, etc. Amazing. Its really giving me "the bug," and for the past two weeks I've driven around with our Old Town strapped to the roof...in hopes that having it at least "on" the car will provide the impetus to paddle more. But who has the time??

In addition, I joined a new book study at school with some of my colleagues. We are reading:


Usually, I'm not too into these "theorists" who use their Ph.Ds to flaunt what is otherwise common sense....but this looks very interesting, and it deals with how creative people (not all the technology geeks) are more valuable than people may think. At least thats what it seems to me. But I'm sure Shane thinks differently.


And, of course, music. I'm trying to make it a bigger part of my life--I've really been amping up the songwriting process, and having (well, not "having"...I mean, its a pleasure) to write Michelle and Chris's wedding song is getting me "back in the saddle." Callum absolutely LOVES when I play and sing to him. I put him in his little chair, and, honestly, I've rarely seen him so happy! He actually sings along (in his own way, of course). I know you must all think I've full of crap, but I'm totally serious....he verbalizes lots of sounds and phonetics as I sing. I can't wait until we can "perform" together!

One big hand, one little hand. Both making music together.....

He wanted to show mommy just how good he was at the keyboard. The only problem, as far as he could tell, is that he couldnt find a way to put the keys in his mouth (like he puts everything else in his mouth!). I know I will learn to love this picture more and more as the months and years go by. Which reminds me.....we need to get some more pics on Snapfish.com for you all to see!!
GO PHILLIES!!!!! GET IT DONE TONIGHT!!! PUT THOSE RAYS BACK WHERE THEY BELONG!!!!!! (and the fake fans too!)

Meanderings 41 (but no pictures)

1. Here are more people who piss me off: Those folks who say "Absofruitly!" when you ask them if they want something.

2. People call The Korean War "The Forgotten War." Well, I call Halloween "the forgotten holiday." Its precariously wedged right in between your "summer" decor, and then your winter/Christmas decor; the Halloween and Autumn decorations have such a short "window" of time that they often get neglected. What usually happens, and I find this to be so funny, is that people "force" fall onto their households--going applepicking, making scarecrows out of still green leaves, and baking pies and breads....all while it is still late September and 85 degrees outside. We like to don our sweaters, barn coats, etc, as if that will make a difference. And, to add to that, the transition from the often transient Autumn to the doldrums of winter is so sudden and abrupt, that the Halloween decorations remain until the following spring--the snow melts and one can see rotted pumpkin carcasses, decaying leave piles, and soggy orange trashbags, with black jack-o-lantern faces on them, haphazardly lying on the wet ground. Its very sad. People often stop caring about fall pretty fast....its "bring on Christmas!!"

3. Every other week, it seems, the medical or science community is looking for free press, so they fudge some study that says water/plastic/showering/eating protein/breathing air causes cancer, leads to macular degeneration, and puts people at risk for a case of "hot dog fingers." What's so annoying, however, is this arcane and ambiguous language these "professionals" use to admonish the public: "Well, I wouldnt say RUN OUT and replace your plastic water bottles...but I would definitely caution you to walk fast to the nearest store." " People dont need to use PANIC, but they 'do' need to use severe caution when considering driving a hybrid car." "We dont need to 'drastically change' the way we brush our teeth, but we should 'severely alter' our techniques." What the hell are they talking about?? Save me the doublespeak, and if you think sleeping on a mattress is going to cause cancer, then TELL ME. How are we supposed to interpret these metamessages? JEEZ!!!

4. Outside a restroom VERY CLOSE to where I work, there is a sign that shows the "man" icon (the little white guy), the "woman" icon (the little white girl in a dress), and the "handicap" icon (the little white stick figure perfectly molded to its wheelchair). If I was a severely left civil rights activist, which I am not, I would take umbrage at this sign--it implies that this restroom is for "men," "women," and "handicaps." Does this, then, mean that handicap people are hermaphroditic? Do they possess a "sex?" Or are they just sort of "all thrown in together?" Let's show some respect.

5. Every morning on my drive to school I see a car parked outside a well-known insurance agency. Every morning. There is a bumper sticker on the car that reads: Those who REALLY care about the environment commute by bike: Join the revolution." I'll let you guys figure out this irony for yourselves....I've got crap to do....

6. India just sent its first mission to the moon. Hey, congratulations with that!! Look out world--India is about to be our next HUGE competitor! So what if they're 40 years behind us in terms of technology--we should FEAR them. This leads me to my next point: Why the hell are people still going to the moon? The moon is the scientific equivalent of hiking Cadillac Mountain instead of the Knife Edge Trail. What is left to learn about the moon that everyone else hasnt learned in the last 40 years? Does NASA still go to the moon? The moon is SO 1969.....

7. This next one gave me the inspiration for number 3 above. This morning on the news, there was some Ph.D yahoo getting his 15 minutes of fame by proclaiming that most kids Halloween costumes are made with "fire retardant" fabric, and how, according to his studies, this "fire retardant" fabric has chemicals which can seep into skin cells, then going into bloodstreams, and then causing cancer. Way to buzzkill Halloween, you SOFT SERVE!!! But, moreover, this problem seems to have an easy solution.....because as far as I can see, there arent that many trick or treaters catching on fire. Am I wrong? Just saying. USE COTTON you stupid Eugenes.

8. AManda brought this to my attention this morning: If (vice) President Bush REALLY wanted John McSame to win the presidential election, then all he would have to do is endorse Obama? Right?

I just can't win....

Woe is me. No matter how hard I try, I just can't seem to avoid a controversy on my blog....only this time, instead of retreads like "kate" and "todd" leaving asinine comments, I've become aware of people "commenting" outside the walls of this blog; I've gotten "hate mail," concerned mail, and people just flat out freaking out about a simple canoe trip. Relax people. I think the thing I find most upsetting is the vibe I'm getting that somehow we're not good parents or something, and we made a "ridiculous" choice. First of all, if you are planning on voting for McCain this November, then you shouldnt say anything, since that is a tenfold more dangerous decision than taking a little guy canoeing. Second of all, and I want stress this, Callum was perfectly safe. Lifejacket. Four layers of clothing. Strapped into a car seat. Placed on a flat canoe floor between two wooden slats. Not to mention that, one, we were only gone for 15 minutes, and two, we virtually "hugged" the coast of Lake George, in order to keep him out of the sun. Consider your own surroundings before judging: In my mind, taking a newborn via automobile through the quagmire that is Boston, or the clusterbomb that is a July Bourne Bridge is FAR more dangerous than taking a newborn out on a pristine, quiet, glassy Maine lake for fifteen minutes. So please, can we put this matter to bed? (Thats what she said).

Anyway, look at Callum: He's as happy as Twon at a beerfest.....
We have been having some beautiful fall weather lately, and parts of Maine got a couple of inches of snow last night. There's a beautiful park in Fairfield--Mill Island Park--that sits, well, on an island in the Kennebec River. Its right downtown, and its a TOTAL hidden gem. I often go there to run, workout, read, etc. We took Callum for a little stroll before dinner the other night. He LOVED the tire swing with mommy--he was all smiles as the wind kissed his face as he went back and forth. OH MY GOD! IS HE NOT WEARING A HELMET????????

Just kidding.
We have lots of trains running through Fairfield, and hearing the whistle at 2, 3, or 4 in the morning is lovely. Sometimes. Since Callum adores trains, I thought we'd wait a bit and try our luck at seeing one cross the trestle. The trestle crosses the Kennebec, and, from the road bridge on the other side, its beautiful to watch the trains meander across the river. Especially in the fall!
My buddy Jay already isnt talking to me, so I figure what the hell....

Its Callum's first world series! Go Phillies!!!!!

I was nervous that the sox were going to end up playing the Phillies in the fall classic, since if they did, it would virtually tear this family apart. Much of Amanda's family would have been rooting for the Phillies, and Amanda and I would have been rooting for the sox. The Phillies are the "National League" team of the Goldsmith family, and, now that the sox arent in it, we can put all our energy toward rooting for the cheesesteaks. Actually, I'd root for anyone who was playing against the Rays....smug little dinks. And Rays fans should be ASHAMED of themselves!!!! For 85% of the season, there were no Rays fans to be found at the Trop....but now, all of the sudden, they are everywhere! FAIR WEATHER IDIOTS!!!

GO PHILLIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tolls

Anyone who knows me knows that my absolutely least favorite thing to do in the world is be in a car: I hate cars, I hate driving, I hate gas, I hate having to rely on an automobile, I hate emissions, and I hate traffic. If possible, I would much rather ride a bike everywhere....but that is just not feasible for our lifestyle.

Tolls are absolutely ridiculous, since we shouldnt have to pay on roads that our taxes pay for in the first place. And PLUS, the price of tolls keeps going up. Being someone from Taxachusetts, I can definitely testify to the fact that tolls are completely ridiculous--you STILL have to pay to drive on the Mass Pike....a highway that has been paid for 5 or 6 times over at this point. And the Mystic River Bridge costs THREE DOLLARS. Three dollars? If I am going to pay a toll, I at least want to get something out of it...i.e. a guarantee that I wont sit in traffic for the next hour. But that never happens.

But now I live in Maine, and I have a real problem with tolls for two solid reasons. One involves safety, and the other involves the environment.

I'm surprised that, with this being an election year, and environment/sustainability/"greeness" being of such exigence, that hypocrites....I mean politicians...haven't proposed some sort of amending of our state's toll system. Tolls inherently cause traffic jams, and traffic jams, as everyone knows, require cars to idle or craw for extended periods of time. This idling, as anyone with a clue about cars knows (and I just "barely" have a clue) wastes fuel, and, when combined with 5 or 6 thousand other cars idling at the same time, produces a virtual "greenhouse gas cloud" I am sure there is hole over the atmosphere by the York tolls bigger than the one that is Rose O'Donell's mouth. But I digress.

Besides the fact that tolls, on their own, create enough traffic, Maine CONTINUES to be ignorant and stupid with their toll rate, for the simple reason that toll prices aren't "round" numbers. In NH, for example, you pay a dollar, and you roll on. Some tolls charge fifty cents---two quarters. Easy. But Maine tolls charge $.60 and $1.75--numbers more awkward than Bush's 12th grade math homework. Of course people could "plan" before they drive, and make sure they have exact change. But let's face it--people are lazy, and are going to pay with two one dollar bills.. This means toll collectors will have to make change. This means cars will stop. This means traffic will ensue. This means we're back to polluting the environment. If politicians weren't "bought off" my corporations, oil companies, etc., then they might examine this problem.

Lastly, tolls have become incredible safety hazards, all due, I believe, to the implementation of "EZ PASS." EZ Pass, in my opinion, is nothing short of extortion, since they are making life difficult and un-safe for people who dont pay the money to get it. True, it could cut down on traffic stoppage "a little." But, I think more than anything, it just creates more traffic and more problems, as people scramble at the last minute to get in their correct lanes (usually every lane except TWO are "EZ pass only." During times of high volume, there often isnt enough time to "get over" into the lane that actually take cash. Essentially "forcing" citizens to rely on technology and credit-based programs just isnt right--once again, it puts the burdenon the good people of Maine (or any other state) to fix the problems of the country. Problems politicians and bureaucracies put us in in the first place. Oh, and in case you're wondering if the EZ pass program is a huge "revenue" booster for Maine, consider this: For those who choose "safety," and decide that, with such short notice, they just can't safely get over to a non-EZ Pass lane and thus go through an EZ pass lane instead....well, they are charged $51.75, which is the price of the toll plus a nice fine to boot. A classy thing to do to your confused senior citizens. Just ask Ortiz: he got slapped with one.

And this is just MAINE...a pretty unpopulated state, all things considered. Dont even get me started on New Jersey! You need a hedge fund just to drive in that state.....

Lake George

I dont know about the rest of the country--but here in Maine its been chilly and autumn-like for the past few days. The wood stove has been in use since last night, and all is well. Actually, it wasnt well for a few hours; we had these idiots come to clean the chimney yesterday, and they were awful....our whole basement (den and cellar) became covered with black, sooty dust because they didnt vacuum out the chimney cleanout properly. Also, they had to move the stove off the hearth (for some reason I am still trying to figure out) in order to clean the stovepipe. Obviously, they didnt put it back, so here I am, shimmying a 600 pound stove across the slate hearth. Needless to say they will not be coming back.

Also, Callum had his 4 month appointment yesterday. He is doing very well, and he was a big boy when it came to getting his shots (he got 5). I had to hold down his little pork chop legs again, since this kid LOVES to kick everything in sight when he becomes nervous/excited/happy/etc. He is 25 inches long (75th percentile) and 14 pounds, 15 ounces (50th percentile). The weight really shocked me (thats what she said!) because I was sure he was AT LEAST a cool 16 pounds. Oh well. He does have some eczema (sp?) on his back and chest, and this is probably due to the baths we give him, combined with the drier weather; and I think he has inherited his mother's VERY fair Irish/Scottish/Welch/British skin.

Today was a beautiful day, and I worked outside for a good part of the day, mowing the lawn for (hopefully) the last time, spreading some compost, bagging some brush, and doing some firewood. This afternoon, we took Callum on his first canoe trip! We have been excited to bring him, ever since he was born. Today seemed like a great time. His papa Goldsmith bought him TWO lifejackets, and his car seat fit perfectly in between the yoke and the other wooden cross beam. He really loves the outdoors--the wind, the trees, neighborhood cats and squirrels, etc. I think the excitement was too much for him, because he was lulled to sleep.....
I took up the stern of our ship, and Amanda, who paddled bow, was also the picture taker. Callum sat back with me so we could talk about "guy stuff."
Lake George is a beautifully clean lake in Canaan (about 20 minutes away from us). We posted a blog about Lake George park towards the end of the summer--we just love it there. The foliage dotting the rolling hills around the lake was beautiful (although past "peak,") and it was indeed brisk out on the water. Callum was as snug as a bug in one of his Halloween outfits, hat, and Osh Kosh "hoodie."
Amanda needed to feed Callum as soon as we got back to shore, so I took advantage of some solitary paddling around the lake's coast while Callum ate. I also worked on carrying the canoe, and putting the canoe on the roof rack, and then taking it off again--this way, I'll be able to do some "alone" paddling, or, take Callum when he's a toddler (but still unable to help me load the boat on top of the car!)

"Before the World Was Made"

I'm a big fan of Van Morrison, and he has this terrific song called "Before the World Was Made." As an English major, I'm always analyzing the crap out of everything, interpreting it based on how I see it fits into my life. There's a line in the song that reads how "I just want to see your face....before the world was made." To me, that line speaks of remembering (and honoring) the past, especially in the midst of all the craziness of everyday life. It seems as though, each day, part of our individual world's are "made" anew; we become enmeshed in relationships, responsibilities, problems, and celebrations--but sometimes its good to just think back to what life was like before these "worlds" are made.

Next week, I'll being my college essay writing unit with my seniors, something I do each year to prepare them for the challenges of applying to their respective schools. I often start with an admonishment to them--I tell them how their family and friends are constantly going to ask them "where are you going??" and "what are you going to do??" But, I tell them, its important to ask yourself, often: Where have I been? Callum is undoubtedly the best thing to ever happen to Amanda and I, and its no surprise that its hard to imagine life without him--I often wonder what the hell I did with all the free time I had before he came along (not that I'm complaining, because I love every minute). But, with the advent of our "world" being made anew, I think we've (or at least "I" have anyway) forgotten just what a past year or so its been--its been absolutely nuts, actually. So, for tonight's blog, I thought I'd look through some older pictures--from before the world was made.

We should all do that sometimes.

Jane and Michelle: Two of my English colleagues. Jane spent a year at Oxford, and then came back to deliver her baby less than 24 hours before Callum was born. We were RIGHT across the hall from each other in the hospital. Michelle and Chris are tying the knot in November, and Amanda and I are both in the wedding. And, for an added bonus, click on her blog link to see what else she is up to....

This picture was taken LONG before any of us even thought about kids--and before Michelle was even engaged to Chris....


The past year has been a year of tragic loss for Amanda and I. Nana Courtney (below) passed away a little more than a year ago. This was the final time Amanda and I saw her before she died. I am sure the Alzheimer's had something to do with it, but I think she thought I was Grizzly Adams....


And our beloved Thomas, who passed away two weeks ago tomorrow. It still breaks my heart to look at pictures of him--and even think about him for that matter. I had the dubious task of going to pick up his ashes yesterday at the vet's. I just couldnt believe that my little buddy was sitting right beside me in the car--only this time in a small tin in a paper bag.
Today is our good friend Brian Smith's birthday! Happy birthday Brian. He is the one on the far right. These days, all of our friends are having kids, changing jobs, moving, etc. Gone are the "salad days" where we could just pick up and "do whatever." Worlds have changed. Worlds have been made. This picture was taken a number of summers ago in the Adirondacks--a place where Brian, now an Episcopal priest in Florida--has a family camp on an island. We just to go there each summer, and it was the most special time of the whole year. We hope, in the VERY near future, to have everyone's schedule coordinate so we can do this again. How often do we let these beautiful traditions slip away? Sarah, if you are reading this: The word "Baxter" comes to mind....
And here is a family shot of the Willards/Walters, taken three Christmases ago--just days before grandmom became sick, leading to tough years of fighting off extended hospital stays, heart attacks, kidney failures, and you name it. Grandmom, as I wrote about a few months ago, passed away in August. But here is a photo from when things were "quiet." Everyone was well. Amanda wasnt pregnant. And there was no presidential election.

second post of the day

Callum's laughter!

Callum's Meet and Greet

Before I write anything, let me say this: I didnt end up taking that many pictures this weekend. I meant to, but it got so busy with everyone at my mom's, that I basically just forgot to take photos. In fact, these five are the only ones I took--and they're pretty random. Perhaps the Favry's took some pictures and will post them (?)

So we went to Mass this weekend where, at the "condo clubhouse," there was an open house type of thing so Callum's "extended family" could meet him. Its hard to believe that, aside from his grandparents and Aunt and Uncle, no one on my mom or dad's side had met the little guy yet. Saturday was actually a pretty rough day for Callum--first of all, he spent about 4.5 hours in his car seat, only to arrive at Nannie's house to have everyone want to hold him, love him, and kiss him. On one hand, its good for Callum to get used to seeing other people and have other people handle him, etc. But on the other hand, I think it was a little overwhelming for him! I mean, its a lot for him to travel like that. The ride back, last night, was nothing short of miserable, since we STILL hit traffic in Boston (at freakin 6:00 on a Sunday night!!!!) and Callum did nothing but scream for two hours. A busy weekend for him. But a great chance for him to meet his family. It didnt help him, of course, that I think he has caught whatever "bug" his Daddy has--both of us have felt miserable all weekend. But at least today he is napping a lot.

Here's one of the rare moments from Saturday when Callum wasnt crying. Uncle Anthony helps Callum chew on his frozen penguin.....


A few of my buddies came by to visit for a while--Jay and Jenn, Timmy, and Tore and Mi Hyun. Here is a picture of Amanda with Stephanie and Mi Hyun. An interesting sidenote: Mi Hyun had NEVER held a baby in her life--she explained how she has NO experience with them. Obviously, she was asking Amanda lots of questions (perhaps she and Tore are thinking kids?????). But she was consistently afraid to take Callum, since she didnt want to make him cry. However, she ended up being the only person all day to hold Callum--and not make him cry. Interesting.
And here he is with his "other twin," Papa Goldsmith. We also got to see Papa again yesterday, and a great lunch at George's Restaurant in Brockton--the "City of Champions."
My cousin Leah holding Callum. Leah used to babysit me when I was little, so it was so weird for her to be holding "my" baby. I think it made her feel old. But she shouldnt! Leah used to come over my mom's a lot when she was a kid, usually making my mom nauseous with the grape chewing gum she always had. As a result, I was never allowed to chew "grape" gum as a kid. So now I am ALL about rebellion.
And Callum and his Nannie. Yesterday morning, before we went to Papa's, Nannie, Callum, and PB played "foot rattles" on the living room floor. Callum loves his foot rattles! I'm glad he was happy yesterday, so at least Papa and Nannie got to see some of his great smiles before he left to go home to Maine. And now we are exhausted......

The Best Post Season EVER

I love the postseason in baseball more than any other sport that exists, and I'll tell you why. First of all, as a former pitcher (and current hurling fan), the pitching performances that manifest themselves during the postseason are nothing short of unbelievable; we see the best throwing that baseball has to offer. Period. Second of all, EVERY win is a dramatic win. Nothing is "given" away in playoff baseball; everything is fought for--until the bitter end. Finally, baseball has a longer season than most other sports (well, hockey has a pretty long season, but hockey who cares about the NHL?). Baseball players might just be the only professional sports players out there who actually come close to earning the money they make (not that ANYONE deserves more than 50K for playing a GAME....but that's a different story). The battle it out from, essentially, the end of winter in April, to the onset of winter in late October. Unlike football players, who show up once a week only, baseball players are out there sometimes five days a week. Its ALMOST like they have real jobs!!!!

This postseason, in my opinion, showcases the best teams anyone could ask for. Obviously, the Red Sox will win the World Series....but I'd really be happy with ANY of the four teams winning; its an ideal postseason schedule. For the first time I can remember, there are no "hateable" teams competing--and there are hardly any "attitudes" (except for Manny of course). I'm a life long Sox fan, and that pretty much goes without saying. And even though I hope they crush the Rays, you've got to love the Cinderella story that exists with Tampa Bay--they have gone from the "armpit" of the MLB to the best team in baseball. And they've done it in classy fashion...they havent gone out and bought their team--they've meticulously rebuilt it over the past several years. And its finally come to fruition. And I like the manager's glasses. As far as the Phillies, they are my National league team, and have been ever since I married into a Philadelphia family--all of Amanda's family adores the Phillies, and Amanda has very fond memories of getting Mike Schmidt autographs when she was a girl. They're a classic American team who havent been to the big show since 1994, when they lost to UNAMERICANS (Bluejays)!!! What an insult! They are due. And as far as LA is concerned, I love them because that's where all "shafted" Red Sox go to play--they're like a "Red Sox Retirement" team. I love the Sox, and I always will, but, in my opinion, the front office hasnt always treated the players with respect (a one Bronson Arroyo comes to mind). Grady Little, the scapegoat of 03, coached there, only to be replaced by one of the classiest men in the game--Joe Torre. I can't stand Manny, but they've got Nomar (another scapegoat) and Derek Lowe, who basically WON the world series for the Sox in 04, and then got the boot. He is undoubtedly my favorite former Red Sox player, and I wish him the best. He's one of the few ballplayers who plays with 100% heart, and I love watching his sinker work.

Okay Jay, Tim, John, and Mike.....let me have it

Hump Day Evening Post

I can only post five pictures with any given blogger post, so it obviously makes it difficult to choose! We take SO MANY photos of our little guy, our home, our life, etc, and its a real "editor-like" process to choose what goes on the hallowed "Goldsmith5" post. However, we do post ALL our pictures on Snapfish, and if you'd like to see those, email me at jngoldsmith@hotmail.com and I can then tell Amanda to make it happen for you, since, just like everything else around here, she runs the show with that.

Callum is getting all geared up for his big trip to Mass this weekend for his "meet and greet." Surprisingly enough, most of Callum's extended family has yet to meet him, since they all live down in Mass. So, his Nannie is hosting a little party on Saturday afternoon, where Callum will most likely be passed around like a bong at a Phish concert (did you just compare your son to a BONG?? You should be ashamed of yourself!!) Also, Amanda and I are looking forward to seeing people we havent seen in a good while. And Callum is REALLY excited to feel Auntie's stomach, and hopefully feel the little baby Favry peanut kicking around. More on that this weekend.

Susan, Eric, Jackson, and Lexi stopped by for a visit last Sunday; Lexi has changed so much already! I thought I'd post of picture of the two "Yummy Mummys." Sarah Palin was unavailable for the photo shoot. HA HA. Besides being beautiful women, both Sue and Amanda have that certain "glow" about them....dont you think? Oh, and since Amanda was out at Michelle's bridal shower on Sunday morning, "I" got him dressed in his new Osh Gosh overalls! Too cute.....Notice how Callum is checking out his new girlfriend? "What's up, girly girl??"

Callum's first fire. As we expected, he really is mesmerized by the flames and the colors and the brightness. He sat in his chair just STARING at it. Its going to be a great winter for him. Sadly, however, we were without Thomas lying on his carpet in front of the fire--that has always been a mainstay in the Goldsmith household. Its still so painful not having him. Something is definitely missing here.
Papa Goldsmith sent Callum a cute Halloween card, and, after reading it to Callum, I gave it to him to hold. Naturally, he tried eating it. Immediately. Like father, like son.
Amanda was off today, and she got a picture of Callum just as he was waking up. Our favorite time with him is undoubtedly the morning, since, after a long fruitful sleep, he is SO happy, so alert, and so full of personality. I love his little fleece sleepers. This one says "Forest Friends" on it. Callum has lots of friends. I have to say: he really looks like me in this picture. A lot.
And, lastly, Callum on his "Rainforest Mat." He LOVES this thing, as it plays music, blinks lights, and makes "rainforest sounds" like bugs, birds, etc. We try to stay away from the "ADD inducer" toys that they sell---where there are literally 45 things to do at once. But this is pretty neat. It has monkeys, birds, etc. dangling from a "canopy," and he loves to lay and talk to them. Off to the left, you'll see there is even his MOOSE in this rainforest. Thank Global Warming for that mix up. Look at the curiosity and intrigue in his eyes....I hope he has the love of learning that I had...but I also hope he has more patience to try and figure things out.

Meanderings 40

1. Legos--the company that makes rectangular, hard plastic blocks for children--now has a fruit snack out....that looks exactly like the hard plastic blocks for children. How stupid can Lego be? Kids arent going to know the difference; they're going to start trying to eat the real blocks. Did any of the R&D people at Legos graduate from high school? What a stupid idea.

2. Pringles has a new slogan: "Everything pops with Pringles." Absolutely. Starting with the button of your pants.

3. "Advocate" is just a fancy, educational word for "complain," "piss," and "moan." I love it when people say they "advocate" for themselves. Anyone who "advocates" is usually a pain in the ass.

4. Sometimes, late at night, I smell a skunk who has sprayed in our neighborhood, and I can't help thinking, even if only a "little bit," how skunk smells like coffee. Has anyone else ever thought this?

5. Does it follow that anti-abortion activists inherently do not eat eggs for breakfast? If they did, it would be kind of hypocritical, wouldnt it? So there. If you are against abortion and you eat eggs, then you're a phony. So there.

6. My dad brought this to my attention recently: We hear a lot about "3rd world countries" and how they are plagued with disease, poverty, famine, and underdevelopment. Assumedly, the U.S., China, and Japan are "1st world countries." Right? If so, are there any "2nd world countries?" Are they countries that are just "a little" poor? What is the criteria? Is it like area high schools moving from Class A to Class B and such?

7. A lot of food manufacturers have recently started marketing a "premium" line of their food product--I've seen Pringles "premium," "premium" M&Ms, and "premium" Budweiser Select, just to name a few. Assumedly (the second time I have used this word), the premium line offers the "higher quality" version of the product that many people have been buying for years. How disrespectful is that??!!?? "Thanks for your support over the last 10 years, dear customer....but, to be quite honest with you, we havent been giving you our best. If you want that, you now have to pay more." As a consumer of these products, do you mind this? Do you somehow feel ripped off? I do. I feel cheated.

8. Lately, I've been listening to the Michael Jackson "Thriller" album (Stevee Cee let me burn it), and one song that's caught my ear is "The Girl Is Mine," where Michael sings with Paul McCartney about a girl with whom there is a conflict as to where her fidelity might be. I can't help thinking how, if Michael and Paul were real men worthy of the girl, then they'd fight it out old school style instead of gently crooning to each other under the backdrop of a jazz guitar and some synthesizer drums. Furthermore--and this is for the ladies--would you even WANT a guy who manifests his craving for you by joining the other would be suitor by pairing up for a gentle, adult contemporary "sing off?" Michael and Paul....two words: Boxing Match.

9. Consider this word: "Toast." What a strange word, with such variegated meanings and connotations. There is "toast" as in "crisped bread." Then, if you feel warm, you might say you feel "toasty." Does this mean you feel like bread? Also, you can "give" a toast at a wedding, where you say some kind words, make some stupid jokes, and try not to appear as drunk as you really are (and this version of "toast" is completely different than the other two). Finally, "toast" is what you might call someone whom you plan on beating at something. "Wanna race? OK....but you are TOAST!" Or, "The Patriots TOASTED the 49ers yesterday." Think about that: 4 different meanings for the word toast....have you have thought about that? Not to fear. I do. Because I'm lonely.

On A Brighter Note.....

Thank you so much to EVERYONE who has been so kind and compassionate toward us for our recent loss of Thomas P. Cat. It is especially hard when, every so often, we sort of just "forget" that he's no longer here....as we look for him in his usual places, leave lights on for him when we go out at night, and expect him to be at the door, as usual, when we arrive home. Its hard. It really is.

But, on a brighter note, here are some pictures of the little handsome man known as Callum Stuart Goldsmith. He just brightens our day with all the new "stuff" he is doing, most notably, of course, being the fact that he's "giggling" out loud when his mommy gets silly with him. And he's starting to really react (in a positive way!) to my voice when I sing any one of the "Callum songs" I've written for him--most are just silly, jingly kinds of things--but he loves them!

Does he still look just like me? I see a little Amanda here, no?
"Hey! Who took the last spare rib???"
Last night Chris and Michelle came over for supper, and we decided two things. First of all, it would be PJ night (I thought I heard something else, and I got really excited, but PJs are good too). Second, the menu would consist of "stick to your ribs stuff." With that in mind, Chrishelle brought over a perfect ham, and I concocted some homemade macaroni and cheese. Chris and Michelle were incredibly thoughtful in bringing us THREE framed photographs of Thomas--one of a closeup of his face, one of him in front of the wood stove, and one of them being a huge "collage like" type of frame, with lots of great memories of our cat. We'll each bring one picture to work, and we'll hang the "collage" in Thomas's "room" which is the guest room where he always slept in the sun. Amanda made her signature Swedish Apple Pie, which is a regular during this time of year. It was delicious...especially served with cider from the Apple Farm, and some great vanilla ice cream.
This morning I worked on some firewood, and Amanda and Callum went into Augusta to do some errands. I put Callum in his new plaid flannel shirt, since it was a nice crisp fall day in Maine. This afternoon, we planned on going to Lynne and George's to paddle our canoe in Belgrade Stream, but it was so nice out that we decided to head into the woods instead. As I've written before, Lynne and George have AMAZING trails in back of their house, connecting to beautiful logging roads, and clearly marked snowmobile trails. Amanda and Callum took a walk, and I opted for a trail-running workout--which sure as hell beats running on pavement for a change. I've been doing more running lately since I know my biking days are numbered for the season, and soon I'll have to make the transition to ALL running (and, in the deep winter, swimming too). So I might as well get used to it. It was beautiful back in the woods, and the fall colors are blazing. For dinner, grammy and gramps put out some snacks (as always) and made a cozy sausage, kale, and bean soup. An A+ meal. Tomorrow, Amanda heads off to Michelle's wedding shower, and Callum and I will probably hit a bar someplace. Then, next weekend, Callum sees his Nannie and Papa again! How fun!


"Hey mom, put me down....I'm gonna be late for the Pearl Jam concert!"

Pets will break your heart....

In front of the stove....
He loved to be outside.....
with Auntie Kristie and Chelsea.....
napping with Mommy......
sitting in his widow, keeping watch....

I have the dubious task of letting you all know that this afternoon at about 2:30, we put our beloved cat Thomas P. Goldsmith to sleep. To say that we'll miss him would be the understatement of the year for us; for us he was more than a cat....he was an absolute part of the family. Its funny when you think about it--this relationship we have with our animals. So many people question how anyone can ever get attached to a cat; pop culture tells us dogs are the affectionate beings, and cats just basically use you for food....and thats it. But Thomas was different. Anyone who spent any time with him knows he was more like an actual person than an animal--incessantly purring, always jumping up to sit on your lap, demanding whatever "people food" you are eating, although his wet cat food is mere feet away. From a personal standpoint, Thomas was my "roommate" for a couple of years after I graduated college, and before Amanda and I got married. Those were some difficult times: I hated my job, I hated my apartment, and I hated my life. Yet, every day, Thomas was there to jump up on my lap after a crappy day at a crappy New Hampshire school.

I am not one to outwardly express my less than happy emotions; to see me crying is somewhat of an anomaly. But boy did that change today. What is it about these pets that makes them so gut wrenching to lose? First of all, I think it is the fact that I had to actively and deliberately bring him to the vet's, sign a consent form, and physically walk away from him, leaving him in the vets hands to soon be euthanized. I feel solely responsible for ending his life because, after all, it was my decision. But I think what it is about animals that makes them so apt to break your heart is the fact that they cannot speak; they can't communicate with you on an interpersonal level. Thus, we "invent" moods for them to "be," and we imagine them thinking thoughts and playing roles that suit our purposes. This language barrier allows us to think the animals are "saying" whatever we want to them to say--and they never disagree with us, and they almost never talk back. Its crazy but its true.

Losing a pet is like stopping a fantasy....or ending a dream. I've found myself, already, no less than 4 times, "looking" for Thomas around the house this afternoon, wondering where he's sleeping, hoping he's not getting into any mischief. I feel stupid every time I realize he's not actually there--and never will be again. How is it that this 7 pound animal (he had lost a lot of weight from his illness) can make a 240 pound one cry like a baby?

We'll probably get another cat, but not right now. Its too soon. We need to try to "mourn" Thomas, if you will, for a while. The final straw, says the vet, was in fact a type of lymphoma--metastasizing around his kidneys. He just wasnt himself--he hadnt eaten in four days, he peed anywhere he needed to (his bladder was HUGE), he drooled a stinky liquid, he couldnt jump up on the bed, couch, or chair, and he couldnt even support his own head upright as he sat. Even standing, which he did not very often, was difficult for him--he was always shaky, and even fell down a couple of times. Dr. Walsh, the vet, told us we had the opportunity to hold him while he administered a tranquilizing drug, and then injected him with the overdose that would kill him. But we declined (I say "we" because Amanda was insistent on coming with me to the vet). Instead, we gave him a simple kiss on his small little head, and walked out of the room--not even looking back. It was heartbreaking.

No longer will anyone sit right beside me as I eat, getting on both hind legs to try and steal my food. No longer will a small orange cat sit by the breezeway door, meowing ad nauseum to be let outside--only so he can bask in the sunshine, and eat grass that will eventually make him sick. And no longer will Thomas lay apathetically in front of the cranking wood stove, on a cold winter night, dreaming of whatever it is that these pets we have dream of.....

But he'll live in our memories forever. Thank you Thomas.