Monday, August 27, 2007

Meanderings 9- A Few Thoughts




First of all, I hope you all enjoyed the video of my super hot daddy. I know my sister, mother, and brother in law all just about wet their pants at work today. I love inspiring people to wet their pants. Thanks to Fuzzy for the inspiration (and the link to the site) so we could make this great video. Ironically enough, my dad cannot figure out how to open this video on his computer. Additionally, he seems to have no interest in doing so at work either. Oh well. Here are some meanderings running through my mind as of late . . . .


1. Do we get "ma'am," as in "yes ma'am" and "no ma'am" from the word "mammories?" All people fitting enough to call ma'am have mammories after all, dont they? Are we really just referring to woman as "mammories," and thus have shortened it to ma'am? I'd like to think so . . .On the same note, does "sir" come from "sirloin," as in the part of the cow? Which one came first?


2. Pissed at the post office for constantly upping their rates? I've figured out a way to really stick it to them: Write a bogus address in the "normal," middle part of the envelope. Then,

write the address YOU WANT the letter to be delivered to in the "return address" section in the upper left hand corner. Don't put a stamp on it. The post office will "return to sender" for inadequate postage . . .and the "sender" is the person you wanted to reach anyway! So what if its a federal offense . . .its fun!!! And how could they ever prove what you were doing? Have people been doing this for a long time? If so, I'll feel dumb. I think I've really got something here!


3. On our way to New Jersey, driving through the night, we stopped at a rest area in New York to use the restroom at about 3am. The men's room . . .like many men's rooms I have seen . . .had a baby changing station bolted to the wall; you know those things that fold down to make a make-shift changing table? Anyway, under the English sign that read "baby changing station," there was the same thing written in braille. Maybe it was because it was 3am, but I found this extremely amusing and I got to thinking. I dont think I've ever seen a blind person change a diaper. Would that be interesting to watch? Or is that wicked mean? How do they know . . .where . . .um . . .everything is? Think about this. George Carlin once said "you never see any elderly midgets . . .apparently their life spans are short too." The same about blind parents; you never seem them with infants, do you? Furthermore, how would the blind person KNOW their was a baby changing station there in the first place? The thought of them rubbing their hands up and down the bathroom wall, as they walked slowly from side to side searching for braille, is one that makes me smile. Sometimes we are so PC in our ultra-liberal culture that it is ridiculous.


4. I can't stand those people who interrupt a class/meeting/church service/intimate conversation, and make SUCH a big deal out of being QUIET, that they end up drawing MORE attention to themselves than they would if they just came in, did their business in a normal fashion, and then got the heck out. You know these people--they walk into the room with huge, exorbitantly strideful tip-toe steps so EVERYONE can see them . . . and then they crinkle their shoulders up to their necks, grimace in a tight face, and whisper SAWWWW-REEEEE wicked loud, accentuating each syllable of the word to last at least a second and a half each. By this point, everyone politely smiles or chuckles because, after all, these attention getters are trying to be as "tactful" as possible after all. Damn this pisses me off. A loud whisper!? If you want attention, go pose for Playboy. Get the heck out of my sight . . . .

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