Part 2 of my 2-part series. The purpose of this list is twofold: It is intended to celebrate people I admire, and its a "wish list" of the way I sometimes wish I could be
See? I'm not all hatin'
1. People who call you by your first name when they talk to you—“And you know what’s a great Chinese restaurant Jared? Ming Lee!” It lets me know they realize I am a person and they are talking TO me, not AT me.
2. People who bake and want you to not only try their goods, but rate them as well
3. Those rare individuals who can apologize to others without any superfluous wording or hedging—just a good old fashioned “I’m sorry,” with some great eye contact involved (I wish I could be this way)
4. Folks who have the confidence to give you a definite answer when you ask them to do something: They either say YES or NO THANKS. They don’t dance around the subject, hiding behind their own insecurities of commitment by saying things like “Oh maybe,” or “Oooh . . sounds good, but I’ll have to see,” or “Let me get back to you on that.” Again, I wish I could do this.
5. Guys who are man enough to hug you with both hands and both arms. I am a very happy heterosexual, but there is just something very rich about guys not being afraid to hug. The “man hug” needs to go—that half handshake/half hug thing is what I am talking about.
6. Ladies who know how to wear perfume the right way. This is usually accomplished by them not being overpowering, but rather having their scent flavor the air as they become nearer to you.
7. These ladies who aren’t afraid to get physically near you in the first place.
8. People who loan you a paperback, telling you they think you’ll enjoy the book. TV shows and movies are easy to recommend, but books take work, and chances are they really, truly mean that you’ll enjoy the novel, since they themselves in fact have so much time invested in it.
9. Individuals who show you through their body language that they are interested in more than just small talk when they ask how you are.
10. Those magical people who have the sheer guts and confidence to confront those who are crying or noticeably upset. There seems to be a taboo about crying people—leave them alone! But sometimes you get people to “take that step” and initiate the dialogue. How many times has someone had the courage to comfort you when you were upset?
11. Friends and family who make the attempts to bridge the gaps in geography to keep important relationships alive. Someone once said that as you get older, you realize how deeply you need the people you knew when you were young. I have terrific friends and family who strive to bridge that gap, and I hope I do an okay job myself.
12. Yankee Candle people. Its just fun to smell stuff.
13. Teachers who realize that “changing the world” really is accomplished by single, solitary conversations with individuals . . .maybe once a week, maybe once a month. But they do happen, and good teachers savor these times
14. Hosts that offer you something specific to eat or drink. They don’t just say “want something to drink?” They say, “hey Jared, want a glass of cold cider?” Or “how about some Oreos.” There’s just something about the specifics of the question that makes me feel more welcome.
15. Men who aren’t afraid to cry in public (but not too much)
16. Pet owners who stop mid-walk to let you pet their dog, and are seemingly unphased upon being asked (probably for the 30th time that walk) what type of breed the dog is. They’re just happy to be there.
17. People who are, in fact, happy to be here. I hope I can be more like them everyday. I don’t mean this in a corny way at all. I’d truly love to live in the moment.
1. People who call you by your first name when they talk to you—“And you know what’s a great Chinese restaurant Jared? Ming Lee!” It lets me know they realize I am a person and they are talking TO me, not AT me.
2. People who bake and want you to not only try their goods, but rate them as well
3. Those rare individuals who can apologize to others without any superfluous wording or hedging—just a good old fashioned “I’m sorry,” with some great eye contact involved (I wish I could be this way)
4. Folks who have the confidence to give you a definite answer when you ask them to do something: They either say YES or NO THANKS. They don’t dance around the subject, hiding behind their own insecurities of commitment by saying things like “Oh maybe,” or “Oooh . . sounds good, but I’ll have to see,” or “Let me get back to you on that.” Again, I wish I could do this.
5. Guys who are man enough to hug you with both hands and both arms. I am a very happy heterosexual, but there is just something very rich about guys not being afraid to hug. The “man hug” needs to go—that half handshake/half hug thing is what I am talking about.
6. Ladies who know how to wear perfume the right way. This is usually accomplished by them not being overpowering, but rather having their scent flavor the air as they become nearer to you.
7. These ladies who aren’t afraid to get physically near you in the first place.
8. People who loan you a paperback, telling you they think you’ll enjoy the book. TV shows and movies are easy to recommend, but books take work, and chances are they really, truly mean that you’ll enjoy the novel, since they themselves in fact have so much time invested in it.
9. Individuals who show you through their body language that they are interested in more than just small talk when they ask how you are.
10. Those magical people who have the sheer guts and confidence to confront those who are crying or noticeably upset. There seems to be a taboo about crying people—leave them alone! But sometimes you get people to “take that step” and initiate the dialogue. How many times has someone had the courage to comfort you when you were upset?
11. Friends and family who make the attempts to bridge the gaps in geography to keep important relationships alive. Someone once said that as you get older, you realize how deeply you need the people you knew when you were young. I have terrific friends and family who strive to bridge that gap, and I hope I do an okay job myself.
12. Yankee Candle people. Its just fun to smell stuff.
13. Teachers who realize that “changing the world” really is accomplished by single, solitary conversations with individuals . . .maybe once a week, maybe once a month. But they do happen, and good teachers savor these times
14. Hosts that offer you something specific to eat or drink. They don’t just say “want something to drink?” They say, “hey Jared, want a glass of cold cider?” Or “how about some Oreos.” There’s just something about the specifics of the question that makes me feel more welcome.
15. Men who aren’t afraid to cry in public (but not too much)
16. Pet owners who stop mid-walk to let you pet their dog, and are seemingly unphased upon being asked (probably for the 30th time that walk) what type of breed the dog is. They’re just happy to be there.
17. People who are, in fact, happy to be here. I hope I can be more like them everyday. I don’t mean this in a corny way at all. I’d truly love to live in the moment.
4 comments:
I like this post, Jared. I like it when you're positive and nice. But some of your sarcastic things are funny and I like them too.
You are one of those "change the world" teachers... and I'm proud of you!
how come no one commented on today's post? everyone had something to say to jared yesterday?
re: 1. And, those same people will respond to what YOU say, instead of them rambling on about how that affects THEM. Empathy is a lost art
re: 2. YUM! Food is love!
re: 4. Did you say ccccccccccccccommitment?
re: 5. I can confirm that Jared, is indeed, an excellent bear hugger. Please be sure that you don’t have a pair of reading glasses in your shirt pocket! Uh-oh. I’m a man who just admitted hugging another man.
re: #6 How about adult men who wear cheap cologne? You know the kinds (Old Spice?!), and put enough on to cover a small car. WICKED BAD!
re:#8 I just like hearing people talk about books, period. Good books. Great books. Literature. Words on a page! How about David Halberstam’s latest, posthumously published book about the Korean War? Before he died he said it might be his greatest work. Chances are that I’ll never read it, but I’ll dream about reading it, and would love to hear somebody stroll up and query ... “Hey, How ‘bout Halberstam’s latest?” He was a GIANT! And, the guy had guts.
re: #9. Especially the people who care just by the way they ask “How are you?” ... and then listen to the response.
re:11. See, just you writing this makes me want to be better at this. Inspiring!
re: 13. This IS a true gift. Not many people will even understand what you just said here, but the one’s who do understand ... rock on, baby!
re: 14. “Hey Jared, how about a glass of Merluzzi 1999?” “Would like a thin slice of gouda? Smoked or no?”
re 15. I’m simply happy to find males who aren’t interested in the Red Sox.
YIKES! I might have mixed up responding to your two posts ... this is half “making the world a better place” and half rant! I am NOT apologizing, Jared!
I am one of those people who wear too much cologne, and I admit it.
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